Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Dr. Robinson said WHAT?!

According to a sociologist at the University of Maryland, moms have about 30-40 hours of leisure time/week. What the what?! I think the last time I saw 30 hours of leisure time I was 10.

Now, let's be fair and admit that yes, sometime during my day as a stay at home mom I have time to sit on the couch and eat bon bons run a brush through my hair by noon. If I fit in a shower before that, I'm especially lucky. If it's a shower sans two little boys and I have time to deep condition my hair I'm even luckier. Really, though--I might have a few minutes here and there to steal a few minutes to myself but 30 hours of leisure time? Who is this guy?

Here are just two examples of something that Dr. Robinson considers "leisure time":

*Getting a root canal at the dentist.

SAY WHAT?! The last time I heard anybody say a root canal was a leisurely activity was.....oh wait, never. I would rather cover myself with honey and lay on an ant hill. That's a leisure activity, right? I mean, you're just laying there.

*Waiting on the side of the road for a tow truck after your car broke down (if no kids are in the car with you.)

Yes, technically you are sitting in the car with nothing to do......but how stressful is it that you're stranded?! It'd only be considered leisurely in my mind if AAA included a pedicure service while you waited for your tow.

Here are some types of "leisure activities" that turned out to be not so leisurely for me.....

Surfing the internet. That's great when you're not googling how to remove nail polish that your 2 year old "painted" on your jacuzzi tub.

Chatting on the phone. Wonderful if you're not chatting with an operator from poison control explaining that your one year old swallowed a bunch of your folic acid pills. Even worse when you have to call back a year later because your now 2 year old ate a half bottle of teething tablets and you find out that your information is already "in the system." (Turns out teething tablets are mostly sugar--how does that work??).

Driving to well, anywhere. During the 10 minute drive to Walmart instead of listening to your favorite playlist or taking in the beauty of nature you are listening to your 3 year old taunt his little brother with toys and books even after repeating a million times that you will "turn this car around!"


Watching T.V. Sure, leisurely enough. Unless you're on the floor surrounded by 4 loads of laundry that needs to be folded and you're 42" TV seems more like a 26" TV because 16" are covered with fingerprints that you've already wiped 6 times that day. Also, not so leisurely when you're watching a Dr. Phil episode (surrounded by said laundry) about some guy who claims moms have 40 hours of leisure time/week.

Eating lunch. Perfect if you're at a cute little restaurant. Or even a Subway. I'd take a McDonalds. Not a leisurely activity to clean up and eat the left-over remains of what your toddlers left in their highchairs. Ok, I've never really done that....well, maybe once. Or twice. But who's counting?

I love that Dr. Phil said according to a recent study, moms actually work 94 hours/week. And if they were to be paid salary, it would be around $117,000/year (or more)! To all you people out there who think being a mom is "easy"--put that in your pipe and smoke it!

***********Disclaimer*************

I LOVE my job as a SAHM :) Even if I did type this whole post with a 17 month old on my lap. And to be completely honest, I do have real leisure time that I enjoy on some days. Just don't tell my husband that.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Mind Your Own Business Trip

Wanna know a secret? I mean, THE secret to accompanying your hubs on a business trip with two small children? We've gone on our fair share of "vacations" with Skyler, because the trip is practically free. Hotel is paid for, gas is paid for, food is paid for, etc. The only problem is the room is just that--one little room. Not a suite with an extra little room attached for little ones to go to bed at 8:00 and be uninterrupted or tempted to do what the mommy and daddy are doing. We've tried and failed miserably at putting our boys to bed then climb into our bed and turn the TV on without a little one standing up in the pack and play refusing to go to sleep. In a perfect world, the boys would lay perfectly still and not make a peep as to let their vacation happy mama enjoy being in a hotel where she doesn't have to worry about cheez-its being crunched into the floor, doing dishes, or cleaning bathrooms--because someone, for once, is actually going to clean up after her! In a perfect world.

You see, the problem with going with Skyler on his business trips with E and T is the fact that at night he has things he has to work on and also needs to get a decent amount of sleep. Well, when you have a 3 year old asking non-stop, "what are you doing? Can I do it? I don't want to go to sleep" and a 1 year old crying because he can see you and you are ignoring him, you don't get a whole lot done. There have been times where it would have been nice to go with Sky but he just couldn't justify the stress of traveling with toddlers when work is already stressful enough.

How do you guys travel with little ones?

I'm happy to say that I have found the answer to our traveling dilemma. How did I not think of this before? When the thought popped into my little head I swore I hit genius status. I remember feeling elated when, to my surprise, I got a 94% on my humanities final in college. This moment was SOO much better than that! Are you dying to know my secret? If you have already been doing this for years, please do not leave a comment. Let me believe that I just solved one of the biggest parenting dilemmas known to man. Applause is welcome. :)

Take a deep breath

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Worked like a charm! Zipped 'em in and they were none the wiser to what was going on outside of that tent!






More on our trip to San Diego soon to come!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Groundhog's Day

So I guess Punxsutawney Phil, the famous groundhog, saw his shadow this year. MY chubby little groundhog also seemed to have found his shadow--just last night. My closet light happened to be on and Teigan wandered into my bedroom. Because there was only the light from the closet, his sweet little shadowed appeared on the wall. I walked in and saw him staring at the wall. I wondered what he was doing until I watched him raise his darling little arm up in the air and saw the amazement on his face when his shadow did the same thing. Then he put his arm down. Then back up. Then he, oh yes...are you ready for this? He kissed his shadow!!!! And kissed it again and again. Then I wrapped him up and covered him with a thousand little kisses because you know what? He's just that delicious.

As he was walking out of the room, he noticed that his shadow was following him. So he started taking only two steps at a time probably wondering what the heck was going on.

Now I have some good news and some bad news. What do you want to hear first? Ok, the good news is that Skyler is done with this year's busy season. The bad news is that busy season isn't really over it's just some sick joke that his firm wants to play on me by making me think that because he's done working 15 hour days at the Venetian his busy season is over when really they're going to make him work a couple different clients that aren't even in Las Vegas so that I really can't see my husband. Phew. Felt good to get that off my chest--try to read it all in one breath because that is how I would say it if I were actually talking to you in person :) Yes my friends, that means my husband has to travel--a lot. And it sucks. But that is a whole 'nother post for some other day.

For now, I'm lucky to have two other men in my life to occupy my time. FBI special agents Aaron Hotchner and Derek Morgan. Just kidding. Of course I'm talking about my handsome kiddos!

Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

That's what little boys are made of. Really? Do you ever wonder if perhaps the person who coined that phrase didn't actually have a little boy? Certainly they didn't have two of them 22 months apart. Certainly. For my boys the correct phrase would be something like bumps and bruises and cheeto-stained fingers....that's what little boys are made of. Sometimes my rambunctious little men are too much to handle! I try to convince myself that obviously this madness no, madness is the right word, comes from my husband's side of the family. After all, he does have 3 brothers. :)

However, the upside to continuously stepping on legos and cars and other pointy objects that would cause any educated, well adjusted and otherwise rational person to curse is the fact that my boys are buddies for life. I was just telling my mom the other day how I finally knew that my babes were becoming best friends.

You see, I typically bathe them after dinner every night. Ok, on my good nights. After bath time is a little bit more play time, then off to bed they go. Lately though, and I mean within the last week, I've been putting Ethan and Teigan to bed sweatier (more sweaty?) then they were before their bath. Besides being sweaty they usually have a bump or bruise or both right before bed as well (right now Ethan is sporting a mean black eye and Teig's got a pretty sweet battle wound on his forehead). That's when it dawned on me. They are my tough little men and they are best friends! They run and chase each other (you should see Teigan's cute naked little legs try to run as fast as Ethan!) and tackle each other and wrestle until one breaks free of the other. They zoom cars in circles around the house and equipped with swords (usually an empty water bottle or flash light) they fight mean dragons. They take turns going down their slide and stack their building blocks until one finally gives in to the temptation of knocking the other one's down. You'd think this would end in tears but thankfully, it causes laughter.

It's no secret really that I feel like I can't possibly be a mother to ALL BOYS. I don't know how my mother-in-law did it. In fact, at my last OB appointment my doctor asked if we were planning on having more children. Of course was my response and because he delivered both of my boys he jokingly asked, "what if it's another boy?" I answered his question with a question. "Do you deliver in the psyche ward?" :)

Seriously though, my boys are the best. If I have another couple of boys just like Ethan and Teigan I would be happy as a clam. As long as they were followed by a little girl :) There's just nothing like watching your two children build lasting friendships and bonds that can't be broken. I hope I always hear Ethan whisper to Teigan, "Let's jump on the bed Teigy bear, but shut the door so mom doesn't see and we have to be quiet." Because that right there--means they are buddies for life and will always watch out for each other.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Enough is Enough is Enough.......

Alright. I'm lying. I couldn't get enough of the Olympics. And now they're over. I don't know what I loved most about the Olympics--the fact that they kept me busy and un-bored all the many many nights that my husb was working til midnight (or later!)??

Could it be the joyous pride you feel to be an American? On the blessed nights that Sky was home to watch with me, I'm quite sure I drove him mental (or he thought I was mental) asking him more than once, twice, three times, "Aren't you just so happy to be an American?"

It could very well have been those P & G commercials honoring mothers that made me tear up a time or two. Or three. "Is there anything better than being a U.S. Olympian? There is, actually. Being that U.S. Olympian's mom." AHHHHH! LOVE THAT!

Maybe the fact that I have a secret crush on Apolo Anton Ohno made it that much more enjoyable? Let me clarify, I'm not exactly thrilled by him because of his looks so much, rather it's something about the way he skates and all the records he was trying to break made me nervous and giddy to watch him! Luckily, I was able to disguise my school girl crush quite well. I think Skyler thought my sweaty palms and racing heartbeat was because he came home early those nights (I'm talking 10:00).

But really, my favorite part of the Olympics? That commercial about Dan Jansen. You know, the one where he promised to win a gold medal for his dying sister, Jane? But then he crashed and burned and Jane died never getting to see him win a gold. Until seven years later, he skated a victory lap of his first gold with his daughter.........JANE.

I. CAN'T. TAKE. IT! I was usually in tears by the time it showed him falling and knowing his dream of a gold for his sister was ruined. And then even more tears when he skated with his daughter. I probably mentioned the fact that I loved that commercial a bazillion times to Sky, too . Between that and my undying need to profess my love for being an American, Skyler is probably glad the Olympics are over.